Ra.one ! You’l watch it and say shit.one ! You’l yawn one time,two times , three times . . . Depends upon your level of patience and resistance to stupidity . Some of you may say , ” The movie was awesome with fantastic visual effects , what stupidity he is talking about . Huh ! ” well , then let me tell you , you have now become ” The authentically certified Dumb ” .
After watching the movie , I didnt understand , what made shahrukh invest his 170 crores on such a crap . He said it in many interviews , ” The movie takes bollywood to the next level ! ” And yes , the film really takes Bollywood to the next level of lunacy , absurdity , irrationality , and idiocy ! ! !

Shekhar ( Srk ) designs a game for his son Pratik ( One of the three things I liked in the movie is the name his son has got 😛 ) . The game has more powerful villain as compared to the hero G.One , as per his son’s demand . At the time of its launch a bloody fu*kin , crazy , shitty incident happens which makes the ass-h*le Ra.one come out of the game in the real world to kill shekhar’s son who stops playing the game after level 2 , which makes the assh*le Ra.one angry . Shitty concept ! So the next time you play God of War , Godfather , or any other battle game on your PlayStation and stop it in between to avoid your boredom , the villain of the game might just come out and kick your ass !

The movie had some cheap pathetic jokes too , on which you try to giggle , but you cant . Jokes such as Kareena yelling ‘ Tere baap ka bochad ‘ ‘ Tere taau ka Poda ‘ , etc . ( Somebody tell me , WTF does ‘bochad’ and ‘Poda’ mean? Are they sanskrit words ? ) Srk irritates with the silly condom jokes which makes you yawn . He does some cheap things with kareena at the time of his fight with the taxi drivers (Saif’s heart will burn when he’l watch it ) . Then comes chitti(Rajnikanth) for a very short time . Audience try to cherish that moment . ( after a long hour of boredom ) . But unfortunately , he comes , introduces himself , does his silly goggle move and goes .

Kareena ‘ s acting sucks like the public toilets in India . No connection between them except the ” sucking ” quality . Your husband died you bi*ch , And you are still so cool as if nothing happened . Her expressions are blank like your lecturer’s face when you ask him a doubt about a topic ,he taught two months ago . She looks hot in the movie . And certainly not the mother of one . Take a look at the pic below , see her expressions , let me remind her role , she is a lady whose husband has died ” few days ago ” ! Anyways , I still love bebo’s eyes and smile .

The most attractive part of the movie is of course The Chammak Challo song by Akon (The second thing I liked in the movie) . Finally after Intermission , about 30 minutes later the amazing song makes you smile and enjoy . ( Even whistle if you are rowdy ) ( No ! No ! I dont whistle ) . You feel like you got bisleri drinking water in the terrible heat of Kalahari Desert . No connection between them , only the ‘ terrible ‘ feature ( I know Repeated Punch line , So what ! You can still giggle ! ) . Kareena looks sizzling in Red ( my favourite colour ) and dances better than Srk .

People may enjoy the train scene ( The third thing I liked in the movie )But except all these 3 factors , the movie is just crap !

Srk invited Lady gaga for the premier of Ra.one . Thank God , she didnt come due to her busy schedule ! Coz if she would have come and watched the movie , she would have made a new album , after her album ‘ Born this way ‘ , ” Died this Way ( after watching Ra.one ) ”

The film has got a wonderful first week collection . Absolutely , in the first week the audience didnt knew what kind of shit Srk has created from the huge investment . It would have been better if Srk would have made an album rather than a movie . Because the songs are the only reason to watch it . Dont expect a good message from the movie , like we got from 3 idiots . You can see Srk saying a dialogue ” Burai sang jo mail rachaya , phir kabhi na chuuthe uska saaya ” as if its a parable . You’l yawn and forget it . Arjun Rampal gets less scope to act with expressions but still he does better job and looks more dashing than Srk . It would have been better if Arjun would have played G . One and Srk the Ra . one .

For all those intelligent people who havent yet watched the movie :
Watch Ra . one only for the train scene , kareena , Arjun Rampal ( if you like him ) , chammak challo and Criminal . The Rest of the movie will gives you pain not only in your head ( not due to 3D ) ,but also to your ass .

Ra . One – The movie is this much shit ! (Arjun says it in the above pic )


4 thoughts on “RA.ONE : SHIT.ONE

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